Now that that's over, let's talk about MacDonald's. Or if you live Down Under, like me, 'Maccas'. I think every country has it's own nickname for the Golden Arches, but that's ours and has been for years. Its usually a point of call on a night out or the morning after, a late night snack, comfort meal or even just the old 'I don't even care' dinner. When we were kids it used to be an after school or weekend treat, usually to get whatever cool toy was in the Happy Meal that week, but it was really mostly about the fact that it was bad for you but you got to eat it. The foods that are worst for you always taste so good; like you'll sit there eating thinking about how bad it is for you but it tastes so good that you don't care. What can we say - sometimes being bad feels so good. Its human nature. Doing something you know is wrong is virtually, in a sense, the Original Sin. Even though I'm not religious and I sort of think you have to take that kind of thing with a truckload of salt.
Speaking of, the salty flavour of fries combined with soft serve anyone?
As I've gotten older there has been so many changes and additions to the fast food chain depending on what happens to be en vogue at the time. Like when Super Size Me came out and Maccas was suddenly forced to start including healthier options, declare calorie content in each food item and disband the whole 'Super Size' thing they never did in Australia to begin with. It was a pretty massive change and with revolutionary breakthroughs in the health and fitness industries people were a lot more conscious of what they were eating than ever before, and for many of us the guilty pleasure of Maccas wasn't enough to sustain eating it blindly anymore. I myself even went off it for that very reason - not that I ever did get skinny anyway.
Another rather revolutionary business venture that the big M has come out with in the last few years is of course, you guessed from the title, home delivery. Now I don't even have to get out of my pyjamas to eat my Maccas or get out of my comfy blanket to procure it in the first place. I could have done that back in WA - just bundled myself into the car - but living in Central Sydney I can't walk the few kilometres to the nearest store in my fuzzy slippers without a few odd looks. Even in Newtown that's still weird during the day.
So Macca's home delivery is something I've used a few times now, and man is it satisfying. My hot nuggets come to me and I can enjoy them from the comfort of my own bed whenever I want. They even remember to include the sauce.
I will say one thing though, and that's Maccas is and has always been busy. Especially on a weekend morning when chances are some hungover person is using that home delivery like its going out of style - I've been there.
So, let me tell you a little story.
A few weeks ago after a night out, the UnBF and I decided we could go for some all day breakfast, nuggets and burgers. So, we ordered it online through an app (I won't say which, but you've probably used it before if you live in the city) and waited. Order confirmed, excellent. ETA received, awesome. Food never arrived. By the time it had almost been 2 hours I was getting hangry (that's the hungry kind of anger when I'd sell you to your devil for food), and more pointedly so was the UnBF. He was the perfect mixture of hungry, angry and hopeful but was quick to get on the phone and discover that Maccas had decided to cancel our order because they were too busy to deliver it. Only they didn't think to let us know.
We got a refund and drove to another Maccas, grudgingly so because it had been hours now and we were starving, and were not opposed to telling Maccas what we thought about them charging us then neglecting us. Plus when we got back to the house we were locked out - so there's that. And to make matters even better my antibiotics and inhaler were still inside - I was not feeling good when I finally got back inside.
That's your context there; we were hesitant to order delivery again after being so badly burned the time before and figured we would take the chance. We had a fail safe in that we'd ring around the ETA to see that it was definitely coming. When you resign yourself to wanting nugs you want your nugs, it's heartbreaking if they just don't show up. There's such a thing in 2017 called the Nug Life, and you don't choose it - it chooses you. We ordered but there was still that fear that maybe those sweet nugs wouldn't arrive like the last time, and what could we do if they didn't? A refund wouldn't replace the void left by those nugs never turning up for a second time.
I guess you could then say that when we got the ETA we figured we may as well relieve the tension a bit.
PARENTS STOP READING - I've told you already!
So, yeah, ok, we may have indulged in each other while we anxiously waited to hopefully indulge in our nugs. There's nothing like a little shag to make the time go quicker.
The Maccas delivery man, who arrived 45 minutes early, probably didn't agree.
My room is right at the front of the house, my window was ajar for the fresh air, and yes, our Nug lord and saviour probably heard more than he'd bargained for. At least he didn't see anything...That I know of. So maybe the fable here is somewhere along the lines of the dangers of technology and being careful what you wish for. Oh we got out nugs for sure, but that might be the last time that delivery man comes to my house.
You could say that our nugs did arrive this time and it was glorious. But we didn't.