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Can’t compute

I can’t express enough just how confusing it is for me psychologically to process the heartbreak of being broken up with by my GBF.  If you haven’t heard the term’GBF’, it’s gay best friend. He’s much, much more than the fact that he’s into men, but for simplicity’s sake it’s GBF for this blog post.  So we are not on good terms right now and the why of it is confusing enough, but I feel like I’ve been angrily broken up with by the man I love the most and am now heartbroken. But in a very different way than what I’ve experienced before - I’m trying to understand it, too. The most obvious thing being that it wasn’t a romantic relationship - but not quite like as if I’d had a big blow up with my actual blood-related brother (though I do very much consider my GBF to be family).  I do go to therapy (I have on and off for most of my adult life) so using the tools I’ve picked up in therapy, let’s try to unpack this a bit so that I can try to recontextualise it. Unlike when I’ve been going thr

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