The King’s Man

I just got back from the movies and, aside from Spider-Man: No Way Home, I haven’t geeked out this much for a while! Plus, it was entirely for the history. 

I’m going to warn you off the bat that this is going to be a spoiler review. I simply can’t talk about this movie the way that I want to without some spoilers - so consider this your first warning.

Consider this your second warning.

Spoilers are ahead.

The King’s Man, directed by Matthew Vaughan, is a prequel to the 2014 film Kingsman: The Sercret Service, which is probably the best spy film outside of Austin Powers and you can’t change my mind. It stars the ever-talented Ralph Fiennes, Gemma Arterton, Djimon Hounsou, Rhys Ifrans, Matthew Goode, and Tom Hollander. Plus plenty of other cameos.

Now, straight spy films like James Bond kind of bore me and one of the best parts of this movie and the original movie is the direction style. It’s fast paced, bloody and imaginative when it comes to choreography, twists and reveals. This film, being a period piece, really hit me right in my little history nerd heart and I was absolutely not disappointed.

The Plot

The film begins in 1902 when the Duke of Oxford (Fiennes) is visiting General Kirchner in South Africa and his wife is killed in action. His son, Conrad, is also there to witness the loss and it instills the Duke with a pretty severe fear to lose him.

Years later, in 1914, Kirchner advises the Duke that he’s worried that their friend, Archduke of Austria Franz Ferdinand, is getting into some hot water. So after some back and forth with Conrad, the Duke and his son agree to head down to Serbia to meet with Franz Ferdinand.

Meanwhile, in a literal secret lair in Scotland a mystery Scotsman gathers a team of international axis spies with the intention to incite war amongst Europe in order to ultimately destroy England. Amongst his group of cohorts is Grigori Rasputin, Gavrillo Princip, the German Advisor to Kaiser Wilhelm and (I screamed when I realised this one) Mata Hari. He gives each of them a ring with a secret compartment hiding a single cyanide pill in case they fail.

Down in Serbia, Conrad and the Duke fortuitously deflect a bomb from hitting the Archduke’s carriage and preventing an assassination attempt during his ride through the streets, only to later cross paths with Princip who takes the opportunity to shoot both the Archduke and Duchess at close range from the street. History buffs will know that this real event (whilst dramatised) is considered by most to have been the key inciting event for kicking of the First World War as Austria and Germany soon mobilised to retaliate against Russia. The specifics of how exactly that makes sense are a little too complicated to get into here.

Back in England, the Duke explains to Conrad that this is a family feud dating back to childhood between three cousins: Kaiser Wilhelm of Germany, Czar Nicholas of Russia and King George of England (all played, rather brilliantly, by Tom Hollander - who, fun fact, has played this particular King George before and masterfully played on the real life fact that being all grandchildren of Queen Victoria they looked a lot alike). So the First World War breaks out. 

The mystery Scotsman directs Rasputin to use his influence on the Czar and Czarina to convince them to pull Russia out of the war, leaving Germany to ruin England. Through Polly, the Duke’s nanny (Arterton) who leads an international intelligence system comprised of domestic servants, the Duke and Conrad learn that Rasputin has been heavily influencing the Royal family and needs to be stopped. Together they all travel to Russia to attend a Christmas party held by Prince Felix (who in real life was instrumental in Rasputins assassination) to kill the Mad Monk. 

At the party, Rasputin is quick to become suspicious and somewhat knowingly eats the poisoned cake made by Polly before engaging into a brilliant ballet-fight scene with the Duke, Conrad and their manservant (Hounsou). I loved this scene so much. Not only did Rasputin’s behaviour make me epically cringe - the real Rasputin was a gross individual for many reasons - but Rhys Ifrans portrayal of him was so creepy and intimidating it worked perfectly. The ballet moves incorporated into the fight scene underscored with classical music gave it a very fresh, comedic feel which when combined with Russian traditional dance made for a very laugh out loud enjoyable action sequence. Plus, I really appreciated the historical Easter eggs in the sequence and methods of how Rasputin eventually did die - in real life he was extraordinarily hard to kill. It took Prince Felix and his friends three tries to make him stop: poison, drowning and shooting before they rolled his body up in a carpet and disposed of him. Rasputin was the worst and you can’t change my mind. 

On the way back to England Conrad turns 19 and advises the Duke that now he’s of age he will be enrolling in the British army as a grenadier regardless of his father’s wishes. The Duke, despite a long held overprotectiveness, has no choice but to allow him to go. Meanwhile, Polly decodes a message sent from the German advisor on behalf of Kaiser Wilhelm regarding correspondence with Mexico to invade the United States, essentially occupying the United States locally and preventing them from assisting Britain in the war. The Duke informs King George of the discovery who contacts President Wilson when it’s discovered that Czar Nicholas has committed to removing Russia from the war. 

As a thank you, King George assures the Duke that Conrad won’t see active fire in the western front. Unfortunately Conrad clues on to this directive when he is informed he needs to return to London on duty and switches places with Archie Reed (Aaron Taylor-Johnson) taking the latter’s place in the trenches. During his time in the trenches, Conrad witnesses a man running toward the British side with a Union Jack attached to his rifle and is informed the man is a British spy attempting to return significant intelligence to the allies. Conrad joins a midnight mission to retrieve the spy (or his remains) to the trenches and survives a fight with a crew of German soldiers, only to end up with the spy in a foxhole. The spy, having lost a leg, tasks Conrad with the intelligence and advises him of its importance to the allies. Conrad refuses to leave the man and runs him back to the trenches but the man absorbs the brunt of a landline along the way and doesn’t survive. In the trenches, Conrad demands to see the higher ups but, when feared to be a German spy because of the mark on the tin holding the intelligence information, is shot. 

Back in England, the Duke is informed that his son has been killed but that the intelligence he delivered was the proof needed to convince President Wilson to join the war. King George visits the Duke, drunk and grieving, to tell him that Conrad was a hero and to award him the Victoria Cross medal posthumously. King George also informs the Duke that Wilson continues to refuse to join the war and will not explain why, stating that something is wrong. The Duke, who initially refuses to be involved out of his grief, is convinced by Polly to fight for Conrad’s sake. 

The Duke visits the American Ambassador in London and meets Mata Hari whom he strangles after seeing her ring, noting that she’s in league with Rasputin and Princip. The American Ambassador tells the Duke that Mata Hari was blackmailing President Wilson after dancing for him in the White House and recording it, knowing that it’s release would ruin him, and that should they join the war the tape would be distributed. 

This leads us to our final showdown with the big bad string puller, our mystery Scotsman. I’m actually going to leave his identity a secret for now - don’t want to spoil everything. I did pick him, it was still a twist, but a fun one. I’m interested to know who of you will guess it! 

Regardless, the final showdown is dramatic, it’s full of action and it’s satisfying. The tape of President Wilson is destroyed, the allies win the war, and the Kingsmen are established with its founding members including Arthur, Galahad, Merlin, Percival, Lancelot, and Bedevere (including Polly, the Duke, the Duke’s manservant, Archie Reed, King George and the American Ambassador). A portrait of Conrad is hung up in the Tailor shop in Saville Row and the rest is history. 

What I liked

This is so broad I will try to narrow it down and give dot points:

- The attention to detail regarding history and all of the Easter eggs. 

- Rasputin - as much as he’s a creep, he was fun and cringey to watch in the best way possible. I couldn’t believe that was Rhys Ifrans - he absolutely did his research into the documented accounts of Rasputin’s behaviour of the time. 

- Tom Hollander playing King George, Kaiser Wilhelm and Czar Nicholas - I genuinely thought this was just such a brilliant choice and Tom Hollander played them all so well. I also appreciated the in jokes about the trio’s personal vendettas from childhood including Wilhelm’s insecurity about his hand.

- Third Act Lenin low-key being introduced after Rasputin’s death as the Scotsman’s next hit on Russia and in turn Lenin’s introduction in the mid-credits scene to none other than young Adolf fucking Hitler. I screamed. 

- Mata Hari - she was a spy for the axis, it was cool seeing her in a movie and not as misunderstood. 

- Polly being a badass. 

- The goat getting his revenge. 

- Aaron Taylor-Johnson - I’ve though he was hot since Kick-Ass. Even if his real life relationship dynamic with Sam Taylor-Johnson gives me the creeps. 

- Djimon Hounsou - badass.

- Rasputin eating the cake like an absolute savage. 

- The costumes - very colourful and varied, despite being a movie technically about war. At first inspection they all seem accurate, too. Will have to refer to dress historians for further information though as this is not my field. 

- No glorification of war. War is stupid and people who support it are stupid. There was nothing glorious about the First World War or any war either before or after it. I appreciated that the focus was not on dying for glory or country and rather actively calling out its barbarism. 

- The callbacks and Easter eggs for the other movies, including cameo by Stanley Tucci.

- The throwaway line by King George about changing his last name to Windsor (which is how and why the Royal family is named that now).

- The domestic servant intelligence network - honestly I’m sure this probably actually happened in some form or another. 

What I didn’t love

- Glossing over some of the darkest aspects of this time period including the refusal of King George to give sanctuary to the Romanov family and their eventual execution. The execution of the Romanov family has always really upset me and the quick shot of this event didn’t sit right with me. Plus it was portrayed very historically inaccurately. 

- Matthew Goode’s haircut. Look, I’ve loved him since Chasing Liberty but I can’t get behind it. 

- Fucking Hitler.

- That they missed the opportunity to include a young Stalin, too. 

All in all, I really loved this movie. It was everything I wanted, full of history which I love more than most things, and is exactly the kind of spy/war movie I actually enjoy. I definitely recommend giving it a go especially if you’re a fan of the first and second movies or a fan of history like me. 

I will however never be able to shower enough to stop feeling the ick that Rasputin gives me. 

Sam xox

P.s. as with the majority of my posts I didn’t proof read this, so any spelling and grammatical mistakes have not been edited. If I CBF maybe I will go back another day.